Wallflower

Shyness and being quiet are not flaws in some ones make up. No it can't be "fixed" but in some ways it can be conquered. In my opinion I believe that shyness has more of a silver lining than people realise. It's not having no confidence it's just that shyness implies being reserved at first which is a defence mechanism that individuals use so they don't get hurt. A lot of other factors also come into play, such as anxiety to speak publicly or even in groups. This brings me to my first serious blog post, something I have personal experience with, a thing called being shy. 

According to http://m.psychologytoday.com/basics/shyness "Shyness is the awkwardness or apprehension some people feel when approaching or being approached by other people. Unlike introverts, who feel energized by time alone, shy people often desperately want to connect with others, but don't know how or can't tolerate the anxiety that comes with human interaction." Personally I think this definition is true. Shyness revolves around how to approach others rather than to do with the self wanting to reach out. 

If you've been labelled "shy" and are reading this I want you to know you are not alone. I'm so sorry, put like that it's sounds like a disease. I assure you you are perfectly normal and disease free! I too am shy. I brave the corridors and teachers at school just like others. A lot of people seem to think being quiet means you are boring or pathetic. Which is absolutely not true! 

In my personal experience I've heard all the shitty comments. From friends to family to random strangers, "you speak?" And "why don't you say anything?" Being the worst. In the moment such a comment can come crushing down and make you feel weak. It is rude and ignorant of people to say these things. We are shy enough already without being made to feel bad about it! We don't say to others "why are you so loud?" Or "you can be quiet?". It's fully a double standard because shyness is not part of the majority but rather the minority. 

The point of this post is to say that quiet people aren't flawed. Time will make them open up and confidence will show. Try not to make those comments because they can effect self esteem, especially in young girls. If you are lucky enough to be trusted by someone shy hold onto it as tightly as you can. Shy people tend to be observant and good listeners which are great attributes to have. Personally I think shy people are only quiet until they trust and feel comfortable around someone. Simply put the message is that if you meet someone shy gain their trust. Don't just ride them off because they are quiet. You'll be amazed at how awesome they truly are! 

Hopefully someone found that interesting! 

Love Dani. Xx